Love & Anger: Good Relationships Are on a Collision Course - Tapa blanda

In this book Dr. Holman (a pseudonym) is an experienced psychologist who had, over the years, developed his theory he calls “Anger is a Hot Potato”. In brief, the theory proposes that anger arises from the stopping or blocking of positive impulse wishes. The angers that do arise from blocked good wisher become the pre-eminent basis for the development of each one’s unique personality. The anger must be handled by directing it outward, or holding it in (where it becomes a time bomb). Molly is a client whose explorations within her are presented through excerpts from her therapy sessions, her journals and her conversations with her beloved mentor, Kay. One of the significant concepts that emerge in his Hot Potato Theory is that “Good Relationships are on a Collision Course”. People hold anger in a “Reservoir”. When it is safe, they will let it out at someone. So when a mate feels loved enough, safe enough, they will let anger out at the one closest to them. Anger comes in many forms ranging from hot anger to cold anger. The most insidious and detrimental to the individual and the relationship is hidden anger. Most people carry a burden of hidden anger throughout their lives. Molly is no exception. We see how she learns Dr. Holman’s methods to dissolve this burden. Anger turned outward is epidemic. Dr. Holman explains that our culture requires us to have a justified reason for blaming someone. So we use our intellect to create “good” reasons for our blame, criticisms or the judgement of others. This hides the “real” reasons for our anger. The result is we use our skills to play the right-wrong game and the blame game. Dr. Holman guides Molly to awareness that justified anger can become addictive. She learns how to search out the real reason for anger, which is something she wants to do and is not doing it!

Dr. Rapkin was born in Woodbine, New Jersey on June 5, 1916, but lived in California most of his life. Maurice raised his son and two daughters with his loving wife Shirley. He received his bachelor's degree in 1938 from CCNY and his PhD in Clinical Psychology from the University of Southern California in 1949. Maurice was a clinician's clinician. He spent most of his career developing and professionalizing the independent practice of clinical psychology. Dr. Rapkin was one of the founders of the Los Angeles Society of Clinical Psychologists (LASCAP) in private practice, and in 1956 became its president. Maurice was one of the initiators of the Psychology Licensing Act in the early 1960s. He was instrumental in the development of the Psychology Certification, and he was appointed by Gov. Edmund Brown to the Psychological Examining Committee, where he served for nine years, including one year as chairman. He described himself as an eclectic practitioner drawing upon Client Centered, Psychoanalytic, Reichian, Gestalt, Transpersonal, Transactional, and Cognitive theories and practices. ...(Complete bio in book) Eleanor Kendall was born in Toronto, Canada. During World War II she volunteered working in Wartime Day Nursery. Later she graduated from the Institute of Child Study at the University of Toronto with a degree as a nursery school teacher. She studied under William E. Blatz, MD, PhD in psychology, who established the Institute of Child Study with a grant from the Rockefeller Foundation. Eleanor was trained by Master Teachers like Margaret Fletcher and later was herself the Master Teacher who trained many teachers for her own nursery school. In 1948, Eleanor moved to Pacific Palisades, CA, where, with her new husband, commissioned Lloyd Wright, Architect, the eldest son of Frank Lloyd Wright to design a nursery school building. The completed building was called Hill and Dale Nursery Kindergarten. Thiry years later, this school became non-profit and Eleanor started a private practice in family counseling, having already taken many courses from the Thulian Clinic. She also benefited from years of therapy with Maurice Rapkin, PhD who became Eleanor's next Master Teacher and supervised her counseling work. Work with Dr. Rapkin inspired her to write a book about Love and Anger. ...(Complete bio in book)